Trials & Tribulations: Innocence Shattered
by BackstreetFan
Summary: Chaos is falling apart. What happens when he finally cracks?
1. Downward Slope

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Quick note: I don't own any of these characters except for Nemesis, Nike, Jade, Chaos, and Hawk. Everything else belongs to Warner Bros. and the Wachowskis. I'm not making money off of this, so please don't sue me!

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Trials & Tribulations:

Innocence Shattered

__

Chaos is falling apart. What happens when he finally cracks?

Chapter 1- The Downward Slope

Chaos didn't say anything as he slumped into the galley behind the others. He took his bowl of runny eggs without a word, and sat down at the edge of the table. Again, nothing. He just sat there and ate. It was as if the rest of the world didn't exist.

"Chaos?" Nemesis called softly from across the table. Chaos shuddered at the sound of someone saying his name. "Chaos," she repeated.

"What?" he asked, finally looking up.

"I just wanted to know if you wanted to train a bit after we're done."

Chaos said nothing. He only nodded. And continued eating.

*****

Chaos stood atop the skyscraper with Nemesis. He peered down. Down....._it's so far away......_

"You see that other scraper over there?"

Chaos looked in the direction that Nemesis was pointing. "Yeah, I do."

"Watch this."

Nemesis leaped over without any hesitation. Chaos stared into space, wondering what she expected him to do. Then it hit him. _She wants you to follow her, Chaos. Jump. You've done this before...remember? Remember.....what... Enigma...taught you?_

Chaos jumped, trying to remember his previous training. But he couldn't. All he could remember was....what had happened to his crewmates. The horrors he had seen. And he fell. The ground rushed up at him, coming ever closer. Chaos offered no resistance. He embraced the seemingly impending doom.

Impact.

Pain. It corsed through his body, making every inch of him hurt. _But it feels so good......my mind and my body are suffering at the same time, so I feel balanced...._

Chaos found himself on some street he didn't remember, in a city he didn't know. Nemesis stood in front of him. Surrounding them were people....a crowd of people...strangers. He shivered. He didn't like it.

The kept walking. Nemesis was talking, but her words were lost on Chaos. He stared fearfully around at the people who passed them by, not hearing a word. All of a sudden, a man appeared with a gun in his face. 

"NO!!!!"

He ran. He screamed. No one turned to help him. They weren't aware of him at all. He tripped. He fell down, again embracing the ground.

When Chaos was unplugged from the construct, he was unconscious. Jade picked him up and took him to his room. Nemesis just sat there, staring off into space.

"Nemesis?" Tank's voice brought her back to reality.

"Yeah?"

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Nemesis stood up and walked over to where Tank was usually seated while he ran the simulations. "I think...there is something wrong with Chaos. He's beginning to creep me out. The way he reacted to the Agent..._I _ handled it better than that."

Tank leaned back. "I think we should give him some more time. He's had it real rough lately. Remember, he said he saw most of his crewmates die in front of him." _I nearly went crazy when Dozer, Mouse, Switch and Apoc died._

Nemesis nodded. "You're right. I'll take it easy on the kid."

*****

"Chaos...will you tell me a story?"

No answer. Hawk stuck his head into his older brother's room. "Chaos?"

"Shut it!" Chaos yelled. He leaped up from his bed and slammed his door. Then the lights flickered off for the night. Chaos was cloaked in darkness. And he cried.

"I can't live through this anymore."


	2. Too Far

Trials & Tribulations:

Innocence Shattered

__

Chaos is falling apart. What happens when he finally cracks?

Chapter 2- Too Far

_I can't live through this anymore. I can't...I just....I need to think...._ Chaos stumbled out of bed, through the ship, and to the galley. The galley was empty. He was alone. He laid himself down on the bench.

_I can't.....I don't want to live. Why am I still alive while most of my friends are dead? Why? Why didn't I die along with them? I was selfish. I was afraid. I ran. And they stayed. Defended the ship. Died._

Chaos got up and looked around the galley, looking for the instrument to carry out his death. He found it tucked inside a drawer, waiting, inviting. It was a small knife. It's weight was comforting. He had the instrument. The place to kill himself was all that he needed. The only fitting place would be his room.

Back in his room. Alone again. He looked at the knife. _Hello, friend._

Knock.

"Go away."

Another knock. "Chaos, it's me. It's Nemesis."

"You bitch," he growled low, so she couldn't here her. He hacked off a chunk of the blanket, and held it ready, along with the knife.

Nemesis finally opened the door. It was an opportunity that Chaos didn't pass up. He pulled her in, and forced the piece of blanket into her mouth so she couldn't scream. Then he forced her onto the bed. She struggled, but it didn't work. Her muscles in the real world were still catching up to her muscles in the Matrix.

"You bitch," he growled again. "You don't understand, do you? Well, now I'm going to put you through all of the pain that I'm in to make you understand."

He set down the kinfe where she couldn't reach it, and hit her. He hit her again. And again. And again. _Morpheus, help! Morpheus, Smith, Nike, anyone!!!! _ Nemesis struggled against the impending darkness. It was futile. Another solid blow by Chaos sent her careening over the edge into unconciousness.

Chaos's brutal attack didn't end there. He tore off her pants and began to rape her. He forced himself onto her, going on for what seemed like forever. He got up, zipped his pants, and smiled, reaching for the knife.

Cuts. Blood. The knife left it's mark on Nemesis. Chaos stood and looked at his work with savage triumph. _She understands now. Now I can die._

He cut himself all over his body, then lay there on the floor as unconciousness creeped up. He would die slowly. And die a death of his own choosing. Chaos's eyes fluttered close.


	3. Memory & Explanations

Trials & Tribulations

Innocence Shattered

Chapter 3- Memory & Explanations

_Nemesis stood alone in the endless black, trying to forget the horrible thing that had just happened to her. But it sat there in her mind, a"splinter in her mind" as Morpheus would say, driving her mad. It gnawed at her, eating her from the inside out. So she turned around and faced the memory._

Chaos had raped her. The weird, quiet guy who she had, despite a few quiet doubts, trusted. She'd thought he'd snap out of this emotional phase he was going through. Everyone went through them out in the real world, eventually you saw a comrade fall. It was unavoidable. She'd thought.....

The blackness seemed to press in on her. She panicked and ran, or at least she tried to run. Her legs didn't seem to work too well. They were sluggish. It pressed even closer and enveloped her, like a blanket. It was warm. Nemesis's thoughts, despite her efforts, careened off in a thousand different directions.

Light, sound, color. It all came back to her. Her thoughts merged into one again. She blinked a few times, trying to focus on the nearest person. "Morpheus?" she asked in a whisper.

Morpheus looked down at her. "Nemesis, what....what exactly happened?"

_Is that...fear I hear in his voice? _ Nemesis took a deep breath, steeling herself to tell him. "Rape," she answered.

His eyes opened wider. "Do we have anything to knock Chaos out with?" he asked someone outside her field of vision. "This guy is dangerous until we can get him to Zion, or at least a ship with better facilities to hold him."

Nemesis cared nothing for the proceedings around her. She fell asleep knowing, at least for the moment, that she was safe.

*****

Morpheus sat alone in the cockpit, cutting the transmission between the _Nebuchanezzar_ and the _Mechanical Folly_. The _Folly_ was a larger ship that worked closer to Zion. The ships had picked the closest point they could rendezvous at, both were now proceeding to it at all possible speed.

Footfalls outside in the corridor. Morpheus did not turn in his seat, he was lost in the pathways of his mind as his hands performed their tasks without him. He didn't notice Smith sit down in the co-pilot's seat next to him. The ex-agent studied the human's face. He could not tell what Morpheus was thinking, so he decided to ask.

"I believe the correct saying is...penny for your thoughts?" Smith asked, trying, for the moment, to be human.

Morpheus chuckled lightly, but the laughter in his eyes died away as quickly as Smith spotted it. "Nemesis."

"What exactly happened to her?"

Morpheus turned for a moment and looked the other man straight in the face. "She was raped. Chaos cracked....and he raped her." He looked away. "I thought what Cypher did was terrible, I always knew there was a possibility of being betrayed....but _this?_ I never saw it coming."

_Mr. Regan, hacking alias: Cypher._ Smith mulled those thoughts over for a minute or two. "You can't foresee everything. You're only-," Smith caught himself in time, stopping before he could hurt feelings.

A sad smile formed at the corners of Morpheus's mouth. "Only human, Smith? Yes, I admit I am. But so are you. Could you have foreseen back then that you would be here now?"

Smith had to admit that Morpheus had a point. The two men sat in silence as Morpheus continued to direct the Nebuchanezzar towards the rendezvous point.

*****

Hawk ran to Nike's room, seeking some comfort. She was asleep, so he jumped on her to wake her up. "Oof! Wha-Hawk? What are you doing here?"

He burst into tears. "Jade s-says C-chaos is leaving! Why?" He buried his face in the girl's shoulder. Nike tried to think of a way to put it gently to the five year old.

"Chaos did a very bad thing," was what Nike finally settled on. "He broke the rules and he has to be punished."

"BUT WHAT DID HE DO?" Hawk wailed.

"He...hurt Nemesis."

A whole storm of emotions swept across Hawk's face. He was obviously trying to sort out that the brother he loved had hurt another person he loved. "Why?" Hawk asked, voice quieter but still quivering.

"He was mad, upset. Sometimes when people get mad, they take it out on someone when they shouldn't."

Hawk curled up in Nike's arms, trying to think on this latest piece of knowledge he had acquired. Eventually Hawk fell asleep. Nike leaned back on to the bed, pulling Hawk with her. As she drew up the blanket, Nike finished her thought.

"And we are no longer innocent," she told the metal ceiling as she followed Hawk into dreams.


End file.
